SUNDRY SATURDAY NOTES

Going Commando
Everywhere I read, people are bragging about going commando style. It’s almost a fashion statement. It feels pleasantly rebellious, like you’re telling off your mom without actually saying anything to her. Remember those conversations?

“Mom, I’m going over to Joey’s”
“do you have on clean underwear?”
“Yeeeeesss, Maaaam”
“All right then. Be back in time for dinner.”

I never realized at the time that Mom didn’t really care about my drawers, she cared about what the other mom’s thought about her. If I had died at Joey’s house, his mom would have checked my drawers before she checked for my pulse. A different generation.
But back on topic. I guess it’s all about time and place. I’d go commando to the beach or the park. In fact, I’d say it was de rigeur to go commando to the truck stop.
But going commando to work? I don’t know. I tried it once. I was nervous all day. I just knew that I would have to pick up some box or something, and suddenly be displaying my goods to the world, setting off a firestorm of angry spinsters.
The real nub of the problem however is this: Let’s be real. Everybody has at least once in their life cut a moist fart. For some of us it’s more like once a day. The other day, I thought I had found a quiet corner where I could discretely let off a little pressure, and suddenly felt like melted butter. So I clenched up good and quickly waddled off to the restroom to repair the damage. If I had been going commando I would have had no backup, thus breaking the first rule of military engagement, “Always have backup in place”.
Not to mention, when I have gone commando, I don’t hang free, like everybody says. My business just plasters to the inside of my thigh, giving me a prickly rash.
I have to make some tactical decisions quickly on this issue though. I have a drawer full of saggy grey fruit of the looms, and no replacements. Research is in order.
As for commandoism, though, it’s not for me. I’ve decided that it’s only for models in jeans and cutoffs, who get paid to be uncomfortable, and maybe for the occasional workout in the park.


Fresh as spring rain, isn’t he?

Be loved,

DEL

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10 Responses to “SUNDRY SATURDAY NOTES”

  1. Lemuel Says:

    I got about 2 paragraphs into your post and I was right where you were at the third. Maybe its my geezer incontinence, but I’ve found “tracks” in the bottom of my shorts WAY too often to consider commando except in the most extreme of circumstances (usually when I’ve found tracks in my shorts and I’m not close to somewhere I can change into clean ones). LOL! Great minds think alike.

  2. Maddog Says:

    I went commando a lot as a 20 something. I felt like I was being rebellious. But now that I am in my 40’s I have to agree with you, there are too many things that can go wrong to make it work. I had to laugh when you mentioned moist farts. I’ve never heard it put that way, but of course it’s happened. And thank you for the comment about not just hanging free. I end up rubbing against my clothes and being raw when I get home. It’s just not worth it.

  3. tornwordo Says:

    Chunks called it a shart! I thought that was funny. I only go commando in the summer. Because I have no backup, I don’t take the chance on farting. I do however, sometimes forget to zip up after peeing, and this provides others a thrill and me some embarassment.

  4. Larry Says:

    Commando isn’t my style, but I sure like it on some guys 🙂

  5. Em Says:

    Well, being built differently and all…

    I started going without underwear in high school. I call it going sneaky though. The thing is, all my underwear would just crawl up my but cheeks and irritate the hell out of me. All my friends thought I was being terrible daring, but really it was a sensory overload thing.

    When I lived with Torn in my early twenties he took full advantage of this situation to throw my skirts up over my head as often as possible. Bonus points for flashing all his gay friends. As you can probably surmise from this, I’m not that modest.

  6. wingedman Says:

    Ha! Found you through PLUblogs. You’re one funny guy! Keep up the good work, and the hawt men pics.

  7. Ur-spo Says:

    yes it is a sign of aging – and I would say maturity – to keep on the undies
    And in Boy Scout fashion, have a spare at hand!

  8. El Güero Says:

    I like having everything wrapped up in a nice, neat bundle myself!

  9. The_Gay_Dude Says:

    I always wondered why Mom’s would ask that whenever u were going to a friend’s house….it was always either 1. Clean underwear 2. Did ya brush your teeth or 3. Does Johnny’s parents know you’re coming over. BTW I love the whole commando thing.

  10. Kalvin Says:

    I’m against commando as well. Most of my pants aren’t nearly as soft as my underwear. And I like to be soft.

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