Among other things, at Christmas I received one of those HP printer/scanners that were advertised for twenty eight dollars. I was ecstatic, because my old printer died a miserable death several months ago. I’d been hinting loudly to my long suffering friends, all three or four of them, that a new printer would enable me to resume production of my revolutionary pamphlets. Sure enough, they came through for me and this morning I was sitting on my living room floor with a shiny box full of printer parts.

Almost immediately, I discovered the reason these printers were sold for such a ridiculously low price was that they come with almost none of the detachable parts that a printer requires in order to function.

Undeterred, I went to my Big Box of Computer Junk and found all the parts I needed except one: a USB cable. In my program of painfully dragging myself into the twenty-first century, I had neglected to supply myself with modern cordage.

So I found myself facing the fact that a shopping trip to the big city was in order. I buckled myself into the borrowed, ancient Ford LX which I’ve dubbed Rocinante, and set off for the big city.

I’m not a big city person. I love the pace of life in my little semi-deserted mining town. I love being near open country, and the spectacular view of the mountains. I love being able to disappear into rough country and go camping on the back side of the mountain.

The single drawback, and it’s a big one, is that the dating life here is abysmal. I’m tired of the occasional one night stands which is all my town seems to afford, and I’m desirous of something more permanent. I’m slowly wrapping my mind around the fact that to get a partner worth having, I’ll have to look for him where there are greater quantities of men.

You’d think that alone would be enough to start me packing my bags. In fact, I don’t think a phrase exists that’s more calculated to perk up my ears than, “greater quantities of men”. It just has a ring to it. But back to the real story.

In my research I had heard wild rumors of a place called the 99 Cents Store, which supposedly had USB cables for 99 cents. My cupidity was aroused(and my cupidity is considerable), and I discovered that of the twenty or so outlets in town, there was one on the side near me.

After driving for forty-five minutes, I arrived to be told, “Why yes, we do carry them! Unfortunately we’re out right now.” However there was another store, all the way on the other side of town that almost certainly did have them.

Rocinante bravely sprang into action, heaving and wheezing, and we made the arduous hour long trek across town, only to discover that the last cable had been sold just yesterday. “But we’re getting a new shipment in next week. Come back then!”

I stopped at Comp USA, which had the same identical cable for $21. This was simply not to be considered.

I finally stopped at the Store Which Must Never Be Named. You know, the one whose owners are worth more than twenty-five per cent of the world’s poorest nations. That one. I’m not proud, but they had my cable at a reasonable price.

We’re home now, and Rocinante has been bedded down for the night. I’m sitting in my living room watching my new printer make friends with my hard drive. I’m confident they’ll learn to work and play together well.
When a lonely Hard Drive meets a willing Printer…

Be loved,



9 Responses to “A PICARESQUE”

  1. Maddog Says:

    I’d give you grief about shopping at the “Store which shall not be named” but from what I understand when I get to my very small town in Iowa in two weeks, it’ll be the only place I can shop for the next five months. I guess I have to get over my angst.

  2. Elizabeth McClung Says:

    I find adding new technology to the technofamily a daunting process – since I believe in PC voodoo – that by doing something like adding a new mouse, for some reason you now no longer have sound – which is why my new flat screen monitor is sitting a good 6 feet from the computer secured in its box – one day, when I don’t care if I use the computer again for a month – I might open the box and see what happens. Good luck on integrating your printer.

  3. tornwordo Says:

    Tell me more about this considerable cupidity. Funny, I would have done the exact same thing, but I still would have felt dirty shopping at you know where.

  4. Foxy Stone Says:

    revolutionary pamphlets? Uh Huh… more like naked guys for you bedroom.

    have a good new year pandyman

  5. bardelf Says:

    Occasionally we all end up in the dreaded Store Which Shall Not Be Named. I often shower a couple times after such experiences.

    May 2007 bring you much joy.

  6. Greg Says:

    Hi Daniel,
    Thanks for your comment on my blog. You may be interested in my response…

  7. Ur-spo Says:

    you are clever!
    Happy New year my dear Dan in the Desert

  8. Mikey Says:

    I have seen some stuff on your hard drive!!! Your printer will spray ink in all the right spots!

  9. Anna Says:

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    back to your blog? My website is in the very same niche as yours and my visitors would genuinely benefit from some
    of the information you present here. Please let me know if this ok with you.
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